Why why WHY am I not emo?! Melancholy is just too sweet an indulgence to miss out. I still spend almost all my free time thinking. But just don't FEEL as much as I did in sec school. Better control of emotions. No more raging hormones. I no longer cringe at how awkward I used to be. Didn't dare to look into your eyes. But how I stared at your bei4 ying3. Didn't dare talk to you. But how bold the letters I droppped into your pigeonhole were.
Ahh, but that at best, is parthenocarpy. And it definately was not at its best. (My unholy affair with textbooks and notes is over. =) Only rmb that word coz Wenqi tell me one.)
So just now I was trying to be emo. Played some songs. Thought bout HC days, but it never came close to reminiscing. Read messages in my phone. Tried to cry at your blatant lies. But nope, I don't give 2 hoots. Tried to be touched by your tainted sweetness. But the cynic in me took over. Maybe bigger eyes are harder to well up?
The last time I cried was at the bank. Extreme stress. Damned cam apps, so much red tape, send $$ over also so mah fan. Last straw was someone telling me postal orders cannot be sent on fridays and whatnot. Was bawling. Ohh, yeah thats why I'm not emo these few days. Stress again. Super super super busy. Much much much more busy now than during As. I'm sick alr! -coughcough- (Hmmm something tells me it's due to mikehogging and excessive gosipping at kbox today) Hope that will keep the crimson waves at bay till thirteenth. THIRTEENTH. hahaha. I'll be a lark then. oh no. I'll still be an owl.
I feel sad coz I feel I have a very limited capacity for love, giving love. Loving my family, friends, strangers. I'm really lucky to have people around me loving me, but that's bad, coz I think i'm getting used to being treated nice, that I dunno how to take care of people. Like I get free milk from teachers/classmates in pri school coz I'm underweight. Like how Ying will use her hands to shelter me from the wings to the canteen when it's raining, coz i have a high Ksp. I wanna be like Pam and David. They just make me feel so loved. God bless them! And everyone!
Ahh, but that at best, is parthenocarpy. And it definately was not at its best. (My unholy affair with textbooks and notes is over. =) Only rmb that word coz Wenqi tell me one.)
So just now I was trying to be emo. Played some songs. Thought bout HC days, but it never came close to reminiscing. Read messages in my phone. Tried to cry at your blatant lies. But nope, I don't give 2 hoots. Tried to be touched by your tainted sweetness. But the cynic in me took over. Maybe bigger eyes are harder to well up?
The last time I cried was at the bank. Extreme stress. Damned cam apps, so much red tape, send $$ over also so mah fan. Last straw was someone telling me postal orders cannot be sent on fridays and whatnot. Was bawling. Ohh, yeah thats why I'm not emo these few days. Stress again. Super super super busy. Much much much more busy now than during As. I'm sick alr! -coughcough- (Hmmm something tells me it's due to mikehogging and excessive gosipping at kbox today) Hope that will keep the crimson waves at bay till thirteenth. THIRTEENTH. hahaha. I'll be a lark then. oh no. I'll still be an owl.
I feel sad coz I feel I have a very limited capacity for love, giving love. Loving my family, friends, strangers. I'm really lucky to have people around me loving me, but that's bad, coz I think i'm getting used to being treated nice, that I dunno how to take care of people. Like I get free milk from teachers/classmates in pri school coz I'm underweight. Like how Ying will use her hands to shelter me from the wings to the canteen when it's raining, coz i have a high Ksp. I wanna be like Pam and David. They just make me feel so loved. God bless them! And everyone!